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Mom Says Let's Talk About Guns

January 15, 2013
Mom Says Let's Talk About Guns

Missy Carson Smith wants her hometown to start talking about guns.

But the conversation isn’t about gun rights, or an anti-gun movement, or even personal feelings about gun ownership – all topics dominating the gun issue nationally right now. Instead, she wants conversations starting among families, friends and neighbors about the guns that may be in your house, and in any other house, where children may play.

Smith is readying for the national launch of Gun Safe Mom, her homegrown campaign designed to help parents peacefully approach the emotionally-charged topic of gun accessibility and safety. The Ticker talked to Smith recently to learn how she got started and what she hopes to accomplish.

First, Silence

Ironically, Smith’s story starts with silence. The topic of gun accessibility in her own home was a conversation she had never had with the person she trusted most, her husband – a man who comes from a long line of sportsmen and gun owners.

“The experience of my childhood wasn’t enough to carry me into motherhood,” says Smith, today a parent of four young girls.

That experience? When Smith was 13, her 12-year-old brother Jeffrey was shot and killed by a classmate while playing at his house.

When it came to guns, “I was coming from such a different place … so negative, overridingly so,” she says. The lack of gun talk was well-intentioned – out of deference to her family’s tragedy, she says – but not right.

That all changed three years ago when she found out – after the fact –that her eldest daughter, a kindergartner at the time, had been playing at a house where there was an unlocked gun.

That was her wake-up call.

Now, Action

If this conversation was so difficult for Smith to have – despite her tragic personal connection to guns – how could she expect other families to do the same, in the name of children’s safety? The question had to be asked: Do you have guns in your house and, if so, how are they stored?

That conversation with her husband– and the one she subsequently had with the parents of her daughter’s friend – laid the groundwork for Gun Safe Mom, a model for parents to politely, peacefully and respectively approach the topic of gun safety anywhere their children may play.

It’s a “feathers down,” commonsense approach, she says, and it comes with a home safety sign letting visiting families know that the family who lives there has a gun safe home and is willing to discuss gun accessibility.

Smith knows every family is going to bring different views to the conversation, but it’s the simple act of straight-forward communication that ultimately matters most. “Engage, listen and act according to your values,” says Smith. “But we have to get it out, we have to be approachable.”

Gun Safe Town?

“I would love to see TC be the first town in the country where parents engage in these topics, “ Smith says. “We can respect differences. We’re grown-ups.”

In light of the recent school shooting in Newtown, Conn., she has organized a community event, “Newtown is Our Town: Peaceful Forward Motion.” She has gathered a panel of experts in mental health, education and law enforcement to discuss strategies for keeping a peaceful community.

The panel will also feature a couple of Traverse City parents – a local father who grew up in Newtown and knew a victim of the Sandy Hook Elementary shooting and a local mother whose father was a first responder at the Columbine High School shooting.

The free event will be held Tues., Jan. 22, at 7 p.m. at the City Opera House in downtown Traverse City.

Most Recent Comments

 
Lisa on January 30, 2013 10:18am

I missed the meeting too and would like to attend a future meeting or event. I think it is a great approach and a good idea. I have a lot of strong personal thoughts on this, but don't feel the need to share it here. Good for everyone who wants to take action! Especially, focusing on prevention.

Denny on January 21, 2013 5:37pm

Very nice, and very brave, Missy.

Carol on January 20, 2013 12:48pm

Re comments made by TC Born. Who are you to speak about what I, a liberal, thinks? We've never even met. How do you know whether or not I own a gun? The kind of uninformed judgemental statements you made are what keep some of us from having what Missy suggests....adult conversations. Farmer b is right. That is an asinine post.

Carol on January 20, 2013 11:20am

I so agree with farmer B. The comment made by TC Born is the type of statement that causes many communication difficulties. To make such a judgemental comment about "all" liberals hardly leads to intelligent conversation. You have never met me. How could you possibly know what I think or whether or not I even own a gun? Many of us do, you know.

Richard on January 20, 2013 11:10am

Gun safety is just as important as car safety or anything else contrued as potentially dangerous. My children were taught from a a very young age the guns are poteentially dangerous and should only be handled with strict supervision after training. We never had toy guns so as there would not be any mistaken handling of a weapon. Additionally, the weapons were stored in a safe.
I applaud for a campaign to show a need for awareness for children and adult safety.

farmer b on January 20, 2013 8:41am

Born in TC, way to reall
y add to the conversation. That is the most asinine post I have read in quite some time. Thank you, we are all now dumber for having read it.

Inara Kurt on January 18, 2013 5:41pm

Missy, Alan and I are so proud to know you! this is a wonderful and much needed awareness out reach in our community.Thank you for doing this. How can we help?
Inara and Al

Jolynn Paige on January 16, 2013 10:40am

I'm so proud of you Missy.

Jim Drake on January 15, 2013 1:20pm

Great article Lynn. I hope it can move forward. Being owner of several guns, I think it would be an easy program for most parents. Seems simple to me. I hope people realize they should be telling their kids about guns. The guns will be with us always, regardless of what the politicians do.

sam on January 15, 2013 1:10pm

Cool logo and I am so proud of my wife Abby Walton Porter who is one amazing graphic designer! Missy is creating conversation that welcomes all to participate and save lives.

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